are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
