If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
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Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
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My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So vagazzling was a success
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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