Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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