dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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