before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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