Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
