help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
