You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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