Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize