brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
