We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
