No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
