Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
