i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
