Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
