wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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