If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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