You made me cry and you don't even care
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Gay?
German.
Pity.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
