Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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