somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
