..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
