We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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