Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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