I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Reggie can tackle my bush.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
