he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
