either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
from now on my penis is your penis
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
is that a dick in a sweater?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
