so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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