There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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