yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
