It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
