That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize