bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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