You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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