It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
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The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
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Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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