I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I wish i was in the wii world.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
