The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
