before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
