Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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