yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
