That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
