dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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