Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
