I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
