3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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