Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
