margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode