i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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