I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
