I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
