Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
