Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
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He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
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Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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